lips like morphine

play to listen - play to read

do you think dreams that we've been having every night is some sort of threads of messages that we werent suppose to be just amused by it and neglect day after and move on. what if? its some sort of puzzlez that we need to piece it all together? okay maybe impossible. ive been having light nightmares these days, and woke up all sweaty coz i thot it was true. i was asleep, but my brain wasnt.. so practically i wasnt really asleep coz i was actively in those dreams. which part of brain is it that dreams being made? i say dr shepherd cant tell. coz wiki says so. but is scientifically crazy. to me. there must have been like some sort of a happy liquid runs through my brain that it only wants to balance up things.. coz i think it says " if you're too happy in reality, id give terrors ".. same goes if you're having a bad day, bad liquids run thru and give you happy endings. something something. tell me purposes.

so lately, ive been googling about about organ donations. i had this idea since.. i dont know.. since jepun mentioned it and since john q? and grey featured this one episode about organs. its totally a big gesture to sign up for one.. but to save lives when u die, thats something else. i have discussed it with my mom, and she thinks of it inappropriate in a way of.. i donno. i told her about when i die, id be donating my eyes, heart, liver, skin, kidneys, lung ++ i think shes just afraid of seeing a body with almost empty insides. id be terrified on that too. mr dizzy would too. but....

so now i know, ur not donating when ur already dead. they take it out when ur still alive. i mean if you were to sign up for ones that gives out everything especially the heart, its when ur dying and cant be saved. tis is what i get from tv.

ouh my teeths are okay now. no swells im all well.

toot.

just last tuesday, i went all morphined as i went out with this morphine guy. he made me high and did these crazy stuffs. we did this one new unusual, we tested our voices in a small box. insane as always. hes the morphine guy. and i would really really really want to get high again, i dont mind if i go o.d.

overdose me i beg.

don't

please do not let anger get the best of you. coz it will only make you look soo very stupid. seriously.

well, i am now embracing the growth of my tooths. and it does hurt very much! not one.. but 2. both left side upper and below. and i heard scary stories about em, and that significant amount of money if you stall the seriousness of those pains. i didnt know it could be cancerous when you wanted nature do its thing. and and i cant let my monthly expenditure to go thereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. but i do hope, there wont be that much complications, and that my mouth still have enough spaces for the younglings to grow. im gulping painkillers, i am max payne's friend now. gulp gulp.

about pains and surgeries... you know what have made me feel a little ding dong about doctors, coz of grey's anatomy. straight for few days now from season 1 to 2 to 3. and during those non stops, i did feel nauseous. overall the drama is okay. the plot is quite predictable coz in some ways, the story kinda remind me of sex and the city, ally mcbeal.. but with scalpels and bloods.

done. gulp.

things..

do you remember still the time where there was a farewell party for your teacher?
a clean break up with your bf?
sending away your sister when she had to study abroad?
when your grandmother died?
when there is a need of acceptance that you just have to let go?

that is it. and it never felt good.